Every obstacle, every challenge will make you bitter or better. It's your choice.
Right now I'm trying to choose better.
Bitter is easier though. Bitter is less work, less emotion, less time in the mirror. Bitter is, "whatever" or "F it" or "not my problem" or "you just don't understand". Bitter is avoidance and denial.
Better is harder. Better is trying to understand when you don't really want to. Finding sympathy, or better yet empathy, when you don't seem to have any sympathy juice left in your body. Better is taking a step back, taking off your glasses and trying on a different pair. Better is taking a few minutes (DAYS OR WEEKS OR MONTHS OR YEARS sometimes in my case) before you make assumptions and allegations.
Maybe better can be "still"? What if every time we were hurt, we were still and let the wound get some healing momentum before we exposed it? When the wounds are still fresh and need some air to breathe, maybe we need to protect it a little better so that bacteria can't creep in!? Once bacteria is in, the wound can easily be infected. The sting deep inside the wound, the sting not from physical pain, that's hardest pain to deal with. Maybe if we spent more time in "still", the wound could begin the healing process more quickly and with less chance of infection.
Better is sometimes "I'm sorry". "I'm sorry" is hard. "I'm sorry" is especially hard when you're stubborn, bull-headed and your maiden name is Runion. Even when it's hard, especially when it's hard, even when you're own wound is still very fresh and painful, "I'm sorry" is important.
A few months ago, I hurt a friend. It took all of my strength and courage to show up. Showing up is really hard, too. To walk in her house after knowing that I broke her spirit with my actions/inaction's was difficult, but it was necessary for our friendship to survive. Even when she drives me cray cray, I value her. Even when we disagree, there is love present. I knew I had to show up. Showing up is picking better instead of bitter.
I've done this MANY times in my life: http://publiclookin.blogspot.com/2011/04/do-not-be-quick-with-your-mouth.html I'm sure I'll do it many more.
This time I'm really struggling because my hurtful actions/inaction's are all embedded with MY truth. (There are always MANY truths to each conflict. Seeing all of the different truths is difficult, but better.) My truth is the story through my glasses, but it doesn't mean it's THE truth.
So, I've said "I'm sorry". I tried on a few different pairs of glasses. I've decided to be still, to be better, to dig deep in my heart where the pain is and grab the sangria neosporin.
I found this little gem to read while I'm being still: http://www.gotquestions.org/hardened-heart.html
Choose better.
XOXO,
Right now I'm trying to choose better.
Bitter is easier though. Bitter is less work, less emotion, less time in the mirror. Bitter is, "whatever" or "F it" or "not my problem" or "you just don't understand". Bitter is avoidance and denial.
Better is harder. Better is trying to understand when you don't really want to. Finding sympathy, or better yet empathy, when you don't seem to have any sympathy juice left in your body. Better is taking a step back, taking off your glasses and trying on a different pair. Better is taking a few minutes (DAYS OR WEEKS OR MONTHS OR YEARS sometimes in my case) before you make assumptions and allegations.
Maybe better can be "still"? What if every time we were hurt, we were still and let the wound get some healing momentum before we exposed it? When the wounds are still fresh and need some air to breathe, maybe we need to protect it a little better so that bacteria can't creep in!? Once bacteria is in, the wound can easily be infected. The sting deep inside the wound, the sting not from physical pain, that's hardest pain to deal with. Maybe if we spent more time in "still", the wound could begin the healing process more quickly and with less chance of infection.
Better is sometimes "I'm sorry". "I'm sorry" is hard. "I'm sorry" is especially hard when you're stubborn, bull-headed and your maiden name is Runion. Even when it's hard, especially when it's hard, even when you're own wound is still very fresh and painful, "I'm sorry" is important.
A few months ago, I hurt a friend. It took all of my strength and courage to show up. Showing up is really hard, too. To walk in her house after knowing that I broke her spirit with my actions/inaction's was difficult, but it was necessary for our friendship to survive. Even when she drives me cray cray, I value her. Even when we disagree, there is love present. I knew I had to show up. Showing up is picking better instead of bitter.
I've done this MANY times in my life: http://publiclookin.blogspot.com/2011/04/do-not-be-quick-with-your-mouth.html I'm sure I'll do it many more.
This time I'm really struggling because my hurtful actions/inaction's are all embedded with MY truth. (There are always MANY truths to each conflict. Seeing all of the different truths is difficult, but better.) My truth is the story through my glasses, but it doesn't mean it's THE truth.
So, I've said "I'm sorry". I tried on a few different pairs of glasses. I've decided to be still, to be better, to dig deep in my heart where the pain is and grab the
I found this little gem to read while I'm being still: http://www.gotquestions.org/hardened-heart.html
Choose better.
XOXO,
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