The new secretary has worked at our office for a couple months now. She has an inflated image of my abilities...She might even think I'm superwoman! Yesterday I was frazzled...today was not much better. I was practically running up and down the halls in order to get all of the things out the door that needed to be sent. Even though I have downtime at work, when I'm busy, it is stressful and I have 15 things going on at the same time. I have deadlines to meet, clients to meet with and impress, and an office to keep moving. When I make an error, I have to walk into my bosses office with my tail between my legs and admit to the mistake. It's intimidating and can be overwhelming, but all of the things need to get done. They aren't going to disappear or go away until they are addressed. This morning she asked me how I have managed to work here this long with the constant stress and demands? I laughed and told her that I'm not easily stirred and try really hard not to be shaken!
Before I left for the office this morning, Aaron was attempting to converse with me about a possible side job this weekend. (As I'm attempting to herd the flock out the door, write a check to the sitter, make a mental list of all the things we need from the store, the things I need to remember for work, how I need to bring my "A" game to today, how I need to clean out the office for house guests, etc.) Rather than responding something like: "The extra cash would be nice, but only offer your assistance if you want to do it. I'm sure the children would love to spend time with you, but if you decide to take the job, you need to line up the babysitters." I was stirred and defensive in my response: "Well, you better get going on the babysitters, I already told them both we didn't need them, I'm not doing it! AND you told me to offer our house...you better not be gone the entire time we have company!" (I apologized for my poor reaction prior to leaving the house this morning and told him to do whatever he wanted, but I was stirred. In my defense, I had not even had one cup of coffee;)).
How do you keep your emotions in check? Can you appear calm, cool, and collected on the outside when you're a mess inside?
I'm back to reading the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich. The way she describes the character named Ranger is not what I strive for, but is sometimes what I portray. I don't intend to seem closed off, but sometimes in order to keep things together on the inside, I have to maintain a calm appearance on the outside. Even in difficult situations, I work very hard to stay calm, not over-react, and complete the task at hand. When I can feel the familiar sting of a tear forming, I take a deep breath and will it away. When I want to scream, I close my eyes and picture something that makes me happy (right now it is the picture of the kids and Aaron by the campfire throwing peanut shells into the worn fire pit).
Usually after a really stressful day I find a place to be alone and take a deep breath or cry or pray or scream! Rarely do I show to the outside world that I am shaken or even stirred, but it doesn't mean that I'm not shaken to the bone on the inside! Just because I'm better at keeping the emotions hidden, doesn't mean the I don't feel them. I have insecurities and buttons that when pushed cause eruptions and I think it's terrifying when I have to accept the blame...for anything! I simply don't deal with the emotional side of things until I'm alone!
Next time your stirred, and before you're shaken, take a deep breath, picture a happy time and realize that the sun will rise again tomorrow regardless of the situation at hand. The big project that seems to run your life at the time probably will not mean much to you in a few years time. The hospital release date that seems so far in the distance will be there before you know it!
Mojitos need to be shaken though!
PS: I have started 5 blog posts in the last week and can't concentrate on one long enough to finish it or proof read it or care enough to post it...so I'm posting this and I'm going to leave the other ones for a rainy day. It's so nice outside, I'm enjoying my books and summer and by the time I cross off everything on my list I don't feel like writing.
Super big exciting praise God for the homecoming of Baby Avers yesterday!
Super big squeezy hugs and prayers to the Hammits this week.
Before I left for the office this morning, Aaron was attempting to converse with me about a possible side job this weekend. (As I'm attempting to herd the flock out the door, write a check to the sitter, make a mental list of all the things we need from the store, the things I need to remember for work, how I need to bring my "A" game to today, how I need to clean out the office for house guests, etc.) Rather than responding something like: "The extra cash would be nice, but only offer your assistance if you want to do it. I'm sure the children would love to spend time with you, but if you decide to take the job, you need to line up the babysitters." I was stirred and defensive in my response: "Well, you better get going on the babysitters, I already told them both we didn't need them, I'm not doing it! AND you told me to offer our house...you better not be gone the entire time we have company!" (I apologized for my poor reaction prior to leaving the house this morning and told him to do whatever he wanted, but I was stirred. In my defense, I had not even had one cup of coffee;)).
How do you keep your emotions in check? Can you appear calm, cool, and collected on the outside when you're a mess inside?
I'm back to reading the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich. The way she describes the character named Ranger is not what I strive for, but is sometimes what I portray. I don't intend to seem closed off, but sometimes in order to keep things together on the inside, I have to maintain a calm appearance on the outside. Even in difficult situations, I work very hard to stay calm, not over-react, and complete the task at hand. When I can feel the familiar sting of a tear forming, I take a deep breath and will it away. When I want to scream, I close my eyes and picture something that makes me happy (right now it is the picture of the kids and Aaron by the campfire throwing peanut shells into the worn fire pit).
Usually after a really stressful day I find a place to be alone and take a deep breath or cry or pray or scream! Rarely do I show to the outside world that I am shaken or even stirred, but it doesn't mean that I'm not shaken to the bone on the inside! Just because I'm better at keeping the emotions hidden, doesn't mean the I don't feel them. I have insecurities and buttons that when pushed cause eruptions and I think it's terrifying when I have to accept the blame...for anything! I simply don't deal with the emotional side of things until I'm alone!
Next time your stirred, and before you're shaken, take a deep breath, picture a happy time and realize that the sun will rise again tomorrow regardless of the situation at hand. The big project that seems to run your life at the time probably will not mean much to you in a few years time. The hospital release date that seems so far in the distance will be there before you know it!
Mojitos need to be shaken though!
PS: I have started 5 blog posts in the last week and can't concentrate on one long enough to finish it or proof read it or care enough to post it...so I'm posting this and I'm going to leave the other ones for a rainy day. It's so nice outside, I'm enjoying my books and summer and by the time I cross off everything on my list I don't feel like writing.
Super big exciting praise God for the homecoming of Baby Avers yesterday!
Super big squeezy hugs and prayers to the Hammits this week.
Ahhh just what I needed to hear! I am a ticking time bomb lately and unfortunately I show every emotion and erupt on the outside! I wish I could bottle it all up on the inside. I will try to close my eyes and picture a happy place next time!
ReplyDeleteSorry you have been stressed lately!! Call if you need to vent...I will send you pictures periodically of the my new craft project-that should cheer you up:) :)
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