Believe in Change?

So, I claim to believe in change.  Obviously seasons change, life changes and even people change. I take comfort in the notion that people can and are capable of change.  Taking it a step further, I believe that people inherently want to do good.  I say that I want to embrace change and believe in the power to change from the inside, out (http://publiclookin.blogspot.com/2011/09/only-thing-in-life-that-is.html)...

I have confidence that personally, I am constantly changing, rethinking how I can be a better person, mother, wife, daughter, and friend.  I have committed to making life changes and I continue to push myself to keep the promises to myself and to remain committed to them. 

I believe that others can commit to life changes as well.  Yesterday I went home to find play dough on the counter.  I asked Lilly if they did play dough at Christina's and she said "No, Daddy let us get it out!"  This is TOTALLY out of character for my hubby!  I am the parent that allows the mess; whether it is play dough, crafts, allowing them to "help" me bake, I am the person they know to ask.  Intrigued, I asked him what was up with the play dough? His response: "I'm trying to be nicer to the children."   Of course I practically jumped on his back in an attempt to hug him from behind, but knowing that he is making a conscious effort to change, made my heart skip a beat!  Especially since I haven't even lectured him lately;)

WARNING: SOMETIMES I AM MEAN TO PEOPLE JUST BECAUSE (and usually feel bad after). But, generally, I give people the benefit of the doubt.   I try to see the good, even in the bad.  I try not to believe rumors.  I hope for the best.  I think people can change.

I agree with many of the facebook responses to my inquiry about change. I too believe that values and morals shift, focus can be enhanced or diminished, and ultimately people do change...sometimes.  I suppose a more focused approach to what I'm struggling with is who are you willing to put at risk when you are hoping and praying that someone will change or has changed?  How many times do you offer the opportunity to change?  How do you prevent yourself from becoming bitter after you have been burned once, twice or more?   What do you do when you are disappointed when the change doesn't last?  What if it involves children?  What if it involves your children?

A friend pushes your friendship to the test every time they enter a new relationship, but expect you to pick up the pieces each time they fall apart when it's over? What about a spouse that claims that they will stop volunteering, but says yes in the next breath? :) Maybe you are let down by a coworker once, do you allow yourself to trust them to get the job done in your absence the next time?

Personally, if I'm the one at risk of being let down or hurt, I'm ok with hoping and praying for change, but not when it comes to my children or children in general.

===========================================================

Yesterday I watched a young mother drag one crying toddler by the hand while she was screaming at her other toddler to hurry up.  He wasn't moving quickly enough for her liking, so she waited for him to catch up and forcefully pushed his head to prod him along.  I prayed for the sweet crying children as they walked by me and tonight I pray for their mother to change, for her morals and values to shift.

===========================================================

Soon another "mother" I know will be offered another chance to raise her children. Thinking about the reasons they were taken from her in the first place makes me ill. Has she changed?  Will it last?  I can pray for it, but I have serious reservations!

===========================================================

The giggling sound of the children jumping on the trampoline fills my heart, but one little giggle is missing now.  Her "mother" was awarded custody.  Strange that her mother fought for her and not her sibling that was taken away a couple years before her.  Strange that she comes with a paycheck and her sibling doesn't.  Strange that her "mother" claims to be destitute, but can finance hefty attorney bills to fight for the child with a monthly income, but not for her other child.  Did the "mother" change from the time the shy little girl hesitantly, after gathering all of her courage, knocked on my door to the time she would yell from 100 yards away to tell me good morning?  Her beautiful daughter certainly did.  She gained confidence, learned to tie her shoes, smiled without trying to hide it, and giggled uncontrollably.  But the court decision believes that her "mother" has changed...do you?  Continued prayers for our pretty little neighbor friend.

===========================================================

I won't do it again, I promise, I have changed!  Do you believe it?