Vacation for ballerinas

This weekend I totally went off the eating healthy plan.  I didn't force my kids to take a nap on Saturday. I let them have lots of candy. I didn't stay up all hours of the night.  I didn't even ask for a babysitter so that I could go out with Aaron on his weekend off.  Instead we did activities together as a family, sat on the couch together, cleaned the house together, went to lunch together...no wonder people like to have relaxing weekends!!

To most people my weekend probably wouldn't even qualify as a relaxing weekend, but it's the best I can do.  I ate a TON of food! Too much to type...I went to a party with a taco/burrito bar and made multiple trips.  I went to Monami brunch buffet and made multiple trips.  I had twix candy bars.  O-bars. chips. beer.  Seriously, too much to type!  I did run 1.5 miles, walked for CF, ran around at softball practice, but only worked out 3 times this week...bad bad bad!

I guess I'll start tracking again since the vacation for ballerinas is over:(  I probably put back on the inch that I shed...it was worth it.  The food and drink was yummy:)  Katie convinced me that even if we have a bad day/days/weekend we should continue to jump back on the eating healthy train, again and again, as often as necessary...

Day #21: Protein bar, coffee, turkey grinder with chips, chicken fajitas (2), CHIPS...I was hungry!  I did refrain from Biggby's earlier in the day because Katie texted me that she was trying to eat healthier too...I couldn't stay away from the chips.  FAIL!!!!! I only had a handful, but I still wasn't satisfied so I had a small bowl of blueberry frosted miniwheats. FAIL!!!!...I'm just not meant to be super skinny I have decided!; Walk with Heidi:) Run a mile

Day #22: Protein bar, coffee...I'm going to post this NOW so that I force myself to order a salad rather than go to the bagel shop like I really want to!!! 

Here is a picture of me in my tutu:)

Witness

Tell me how your life has been changed by Christ.  It can be a specific example of how you witnessed Christ the other day at the grocery store, how you see God at work through others, or your life journey, your conversion experience or any other way Christ has changed your life.

This is the challenge presented by Pastor Jennifer Williamson a few weeks ago.  It's common knowledge that I love her and continually she insists on trying to make me a better person.  When she first presented the challenge I thought to myself, I've already done this exercise for her!  I obviously should be awarded a get out of homework free pass since I not only wrote a very personal witness, but also delivered a message to the congregation on my witness! I thought to myself nobody really wants to hear me witness again.  I just told a huge chunk of my story in October!   You can read it here:  http://publiclookin.blogspot.com/2011/10/as-some-of-you-know-one-of-things-that.html

Two days after listening to the sermon on witnessing, I received the most beautiful witness account from one of my friends in my inbox.  Tears were streaming down my face as she recited her most recent encounter with Christ. I felt so very honored that she felt compelled to share her witness with me.  I wished I could hug her at that very second.  The love of Christ was overflowing, seeping out of every pore, compassion and grace were taking over a spot in her heart that used to hold sadness and loss. It made me feel more connected to her and Him...

Then I discarded the witness thing again.  This time I used the excuse that I witness all the time.  I am open and honest with everyone that asks about my faith and my faith journey.  I invite people to join me in church and at Bible study whenever I feel it appropriate.  I often ask for prayers.  That's enough, right?

Last night I had a young woman over who is trying to start a women's ministry in the university atmosphere.  She was raw and honest.  Her enthusiasm to reach out is obvious.  She openly told her story of coming to live for God.  Once I again I felt inspired and more connected to this young lady and Him. 

So, I decided I will witness again...now that I feel called to do so.  I've decided not to witness on my personal journey this time, but instead I will witness about how God uses me to work for Him.  More particularly when I feel "called" to do something and what I get to witness when I act on what I feel called to do.

Many times it's as simple as picking up the phone.  I have made it a practice to call someone or shoot them a text when they pop into my head.  I can't even count the number of times their first response is something to the tune of "I am so happy to hear your voice, I am having a particularly bad day today".  When we talk through the problems we are facing, usually both parties leave the conversation a little more confident in their ability to tackle whatever it is they are overwhelmed with at the time.  I used to think, I'll call them tomorrow or I'm going to see them next week.  Now I call them as soon as I can, just in case they popped into my head because they need me then, not tomorrow or next week. Listen when you are called.

Sometimes, well I haven't in a long time, but I will be sending one this week, I send cards.  Handmade, personalized to the recipient, out of the blue, just because cards.  Have you ever received a card like this?  Didn't it make you feel special, cared for, loved?  I already know who I want to send the card to, I have the address in my inbox and I have a deadline of Wednesday to send it.  I can't wait until the person receives it.  I hope they understand how much they are loved and admired for their strength, honesty and grace by people they probably think have long since forgotten about them.  Act on the random thoughts that run around in your head!

Occasionally, I drive by a place and feel like I just have to stop.  Sometimes it's our former neighbor, Betty.  Sometimes it's a friend in the hospital. Sometimes it's my aunt and uncles house.  No matter where it is, I ALWAYS feel better when I stop.  Even if we are super busy, need baths and snacks and I know we will not be ready in time for bedtime.  Even if I'm tired and cranky.  Even if I'm supposed to be working.

Last week I was running errands for one of the partners at the firm.  I drove by the hospital the first time and thought "Hmm, I should probably stop. She did have particularly awful night."  Even though I was working, I just had to stop, just for a little visit so that my friend would know that I was thinking about her.  I stopped in the gift shop and purchased a willow tree figurine (my absolute favorite thing to give during times of need as most of my friends can attest to).   I found the perfect one!  A perfect little boy holding up a balloon with "hope" spelled inside the balloon...and a Snickers because that's her fav;) What I witnessed was a frightened mother clinging to her faith.  Rather than asking "why me?" or question the doctors as to why she must stay in the hospital, she has decided to give it all to God.   I was able to make her laugh and hug away just an ounce of fear because I stopped my busy life for a second to tell her that I'm praying, that I'm here and I love her.  Don't drive by because you're too busy.

What do I get to witness when I listen to the calling? Love, mercy, grace; All of the things that draw me closer to Him.   All of the reasons I am so hungry to learn more about His words.  Listen when you are called, act and take the time to extend His Grace.  You'll be surprised what you are able to witness!

Tutu's are for ballerinas

Day 15: Protein bar, coffee, salad with ranch and cheese, Shakeology, one-half of a raisin english muffin, healthy cookie; No exercise

Day 16: Protein bar, coffee, turkey tom, bbq chips, 3 pieces of homemade pizza with artichokes, onion and cheese, pistachios; Turbofire with Aricca, Amy, Lindsey and more:)

Day 17: healthy cookie, coffee, twix, 6 inch spicy Italian from subway, protein bar (I was too busy at work to eat...wasn't intentionally starving myself); NO EXERCISE...addicted to book...need to put down book and exercise...need to run...need to be able to complete 3.5 miles with obstacles...$70 is not enough to keep me motivated for the tutu race! Maybe if I try the tutu on again I will be inspired again!


Day 18: Raisin English muffin, coffee, chef salad with ranch, hot dog, french fries, assorted gross veggies, pickle, protein bar (WOULD HAVE EATEN CHIPS, BUT WE DIDN'T HAVE ANY), 3 beers; 2.1 mile jog

Day 19: protein bar, coffee, DONUT:(  They just look so yummy, I couldn't walk by and not grab one.  Zero willpower! ZERO!

In order to get 4 workouts in this week I'm going to have to do two out of three days:(  Shouldn't have slacked earlier this week because I know I'm not going to want to do one tonight...hopefully I can force myself to do one tomorrow and Sunday!

Screw it, tutu's are for ballerinas and I'm not a ballerina! Less than a month til the tutu race...I have a feeling this is what our picture is going to look like:)

Operation Tutu...pants are starting to fit better...NOT!

Day 11: Protein bar, coffee, turkey sandwich on wheat-lettuce, banana peppers, American cheese, mayo, pickle, healthy cookie, sour patch kids, chicken, asparagus, chocolate milk...going to bed so I don't eat anything else!; Jog 1 mile, walk 1 mile...easy workout needed...not just because my pants fit better, my body is screaming to take a break! Bought a new pair of workout pants and a tie dye sports bra...didn't give me any extra motivation to run harder or faster:) Running sucks.

Day 12: Protein bar, coffee, chai latte w soy, soft taco supreme, cheese quesadilla, Shepard's pie, wheat thins, raisin bran crunch; jog 1.5 miles and kettlebell workout

Day 13: Matt Hammer is the devil! One (Aaron only bought one for each of us, so he's not totally in the dog house;)) doughnut from Ideal Bakery.  Eaters remorse after I ran...since I ran solely for the doughnut when I was planning on running for my beer tonight!  Matt Hammer-devil!, roots chicken sandwich, potato salad, ice cream with hot fudge and peanut butter, cheeseburger, Friday night fries, cookie, chips, cheese puffs... pretty much anything that was placed in front of me after WAY TOO MANY beers...I think I threw the majority of it up though...mid conversation with my lover:); 2 mile jog

Day 14: Coffee, 3 oreos during fellowship at church...yep, I was up, showered, dressed, children ready and at Sunday school at 9am.  It was rough and I looked like I was going to fall over, but I made it;)  Cheeseburger, fries, COKE...(yummy, I missed pop the last couple weeks), Shepard's pie, GALLONS of water, Gatorade; 3.5 hours of straight volleyball sweating out beer.

SOOOO, when I started writing this post my pants were fitting better...after this weekend, back to the very beginning...it's not the very best place to start!

Back to looking like this guy below...eating my rabbit food for lunch!

What do I stand for?

What do I stand for? Most nights, I don't know.

LOVING Fun. lately.  Thought provoking music on life with a fun beat and great lyrics.  They are quickly becoming one of my favorite groups!  I am even choosing to listen to them over Lily, Sarah and PJ most nights!

What beliefs build your foundation?  What things make you, you? How can you find the good out of the really bad? And do you have the strength to search for the good over and over again? When you're on the top, do you hold true to your beliefs or do you do whatever it takes to continue to stay at the top?  How do you rely on your beliefs in times of despair?

In Bible study we talked about how the person that rises to power out of love is usually defeated...or killed. The person in power out of authority usually kills/defeats the person in power out of love.  Jesus, The One that healed the sick, calmed the storm, raised the dead, was crucified under Pontius Pilate after Pilate himself stated: “I find no basis for a charge against this man.”! Isn't that sad?

This is only one example of authority over love, but it happens all of the time.  It's the reason that so many people believe sayings like "nice guys finish last" or "being nice gets you nowhere".   History seems to support these theories! 

Are you still ready to fight for what you stand for when you think of it in these terms?  The beliefs that you listed in your mind when you read the questions at the beginning of the post, do you stand for them when it's difficult, when you're scared, when you don't know the correct answer?  Would you still stand up for your beliefs if you knew it meant you would finish last?

It's easy to claim that you believe this and support that when you're on the top, but what do you cling to when you're climbing out of the pit?

Take the time to really think about what you stand for!

What do I stand for? Most night, I don't know.

Operation Tutu #2

DAY 5 ALWAYS is my "start to give up on diet" day.  Day 7 is always, "screw this, I don't want to be skinny this bad" day.

Day 5: Protein bar, coffee, McD's cheeseburger and small fry (I WAS GOING TO SEE MY FRIEND IN THE HOSPITAL AND THAT'S WHAT SHE WANTED...CUT ME SOME SLACK;)) But it was totally yummy and I did not get a pop;)  I suppose Shakeology is what's for dinner! Shakeology and a teeny tiny piece of pizza, popcorn; Week 2 Jillian and 1.25 jog

Day 6: coffee, roast beef sandwich-10 chips...seriously, I counted!!, healthy cookie...FALL OFF BANDWAGON AGAIN HERE!! Marg, basket of chips (SERIOUSLY LIKE THE WHOLE BASKET) and chicken enchilada from Dirty Ernies; Walk 2 miles-totally didn't want to do anything.  My knee hurt, I was tired from running around all day and did not want to do anything.  2 mile walk was the best I could do!

Day 7: Protein bar, coffee, cod fillet, rice, hot dog, handful of chips, one piece of cheese pizza, protein bar; 3 hours of volleyball

I TOLD YOU I WOULD SUCK FROM DAY 5-7...starting over again;)

Day 8: protein bar, coffee, chai latte w soy-eeekkkk...I said yes to the partner that is equally addicted to Biggby's, but told him not to ask me again all week, turkey sub from subway, STARVING DURING THE AFTERNOON! My stomach is making freak noises too.  I REALLY want to go buy a bag of chips...yummmm...I WANT CHIPS! I didn't have any though...Shakeology and spinach salad, one healthy cookie while it was fresh out of the oven...it almost tasted like a real cookie...almost, apple; Insanity; Pure Cardio...sweatin' like an Ashley...with Ashley:)

Day 9: Protein bar, coffee, HUNGRY, buffalo chicken salad with cheese and ranch...I was starving and needed something with my rabbit food, piece of sourdough bread with butter, spaghetti with chicken breast, 3 healthy cookies...could not get full!; Insanity: Cardio Plyo with Ash and Amy:)

Day 10: SORE!! Protein bar, coffee, 2 pieces of Vito's pan mushroom/peperoni pizza, 2 pieces of cheese bread...it's admin day-I had to eat with the office! I did refrain from purchasing a coke.  I really want one, that has to count for something;), two sausage links, raspberry mocha from Main Street Mocha, healthy cookie, peanut butter and jelly sandwich...probably have a couple beers with Aaron if I can stay up til he gets home; 2.5 mile jog

I did bad again today...not as bad as I would have done 10 days ago, but not good either...I'll start over again tomorrow.  Or maybe I'll go with one of my friends approaches this week!? Go tanning and get my hair done-5 pounds gone instantly:)


 I have been referred to as a chipmunk my entire life (by somebunny that loves me)...rumor has it I have chipmunk cheeks...here is me dancing in my tutu for you today:)

Operation TUTU

So, someone that is not very intelligent, decided it was a GRAND idea to convince some of her friends to sign up for the warrior dash.  A person that has NEVER liked to run and wasn't really even working out when she thought it was a good idea to sign up to race 3.5 miles WITH obstacles.  A person that really likes chips and beer...oh, yeah, me. I decided that we should do this stupid warrior dash.  Ashley decided that we should wear these "cute little tutus"...except I tried it on and it's NOT CUTE on me!!! I look like the overweight toothfairy.  It's frightening!

On a mission after a picture in the tutu shocked me into crash fitness/starvation mode!  I needed some motivation for the tutu race and bathing suit season anyways...the disgusting tutu picture did the trick!  Cutting out pop, chips, and beer adding water and veggies...I hate veggies. Committing to a workout at least 4 times a week. Most likely I will still purchase a different tank top because I'm not envisioning my Mommy pouch/beer belly getting to the point where I feel comfortable in that tight bright blue tank top that shows every roll and curve, but hopefully I will look a little more appealing by the end of Operation Tutu!

Day 1: Granola bar, coffee, STARVING BEFORE LUNCH salad-no cheese or meat with ranch, vitamin water, shakeology, 3/4 piece of cheese pizza, popcorn; 2.75 miles logged

Day 2: Granola bar, coffee, 1/4 of the full size garbage salad (last week I ate the entire thing...EEEKKK),  shakeology, one piece of bacon, apple (Full all day until about 9pm...apple did help); TurboFire with Aricca and walk with Amanda:)

Day 3: Protein bar, coffee, chai latte w soy from Biggby's (totally not my fault...a partner at the firm beeped with a request to use coupon-I had to do it!), wheat bagel with cream cheese, one-half of a roast beef sandwich on sourdough bread with cheese and a small amount of mayo, small helping of mac and cheese, apple ...REAL FOOD WAS AMAZING TODAY!; Brisk 2 mile walk/run with Marci:)

Day 4: Protein bar, coffee, garden salad-no cheese or meat with ranch, baked potato with lots of broccoli and pepper, a little bit of cheese and a pinch of bacon...and I'm stuffed!  Two healthy cookies (oatmeal, raisin, cranberry, kuskus, almonds, wheat flour, butter). It's crazy how in less than one week of eating less I'm already used to it.  I don't feel like I'm starving and I have more energy. (STILL TOTALLY WANT THE CHIPS, POP, AND BEER).  I feel like I can't drink enough water.  I'm thristy all the time...anyone know why?; Week 3 of 30 Day Shred and a 1.25 mile jog

Anyways, I will not post Operation Tutu updates to facebook after this, but for those of you that have started a mission of your own, you can check your progress against mine, but I don't own a scale and I'm too lazy to measure. So really you can just follow if you're nosey and want to make yourself feel better about your dieting failures.  I always start slacking around day 5 and give up totally by day 7:)  Really I'm just blogging this so that I can complain when I'm hungry and hold myself accountable for my intake and exercise.  I'm hoping that this accountability will force me to make this last longer than my usual week!  Oh and I'm only drinking alcohol April 28th and May 5th-don't invite me to have cocktails.  I'm on a mission...I bet my friends will start a pool to see how long this will last:)

THIS IS EXACLY WHAT I LOOK LIKE THIS WEEK...well, actually, his breasts might be bigger than mine:)