It's REALLY easy to find characteristics and traits in others that DRIVE US CRAZY.
One of the secretaries at my office will not do the dishes. REFUSES. She's been here for four months and I'm fairly confident that she hasn't done them once. She can hear when the other secretary does them. She can hear when I do them. Does she think she's too good to do them? Does she think she does more work than us? Who knows? I could easily let this eat at me. I could feed the negative thoughts when the other secretary vents to me.
Instead I've made a conscience decision to step away from the drama. When the other secretary vents, I let her get it all out and then tell her 'thank you for doing the dishes'. I usually continue to praise her and tell her that we really do appreciate that she helps out with the break room duties. She feels appreciated and we both end up laughing because I refer to her as Cinderella. I do the dishes on the days she isn't in the office. It's not hard, it doesn't take much effort and normally I enjoy the break from my office. Find the grace, step away from the drama.
When it's something I feel more passionately about, I have to use more focus to find the grace.
For example, take a loaded question: Can you believe the way he-she-they acted?
It is SOOOOO easy to respond to this question with drama: No, can you?! What is his-her-their deal? Why does he-she or do they need to act like that?
Practicing: Oh, whatever, maybe they had a bad day (exhale)! Do you have any fun plans for the weekend (inhale)?
Inhale the positive energy, exhale the drama! (Yes, I am really liking yoga AND I have successfully completed TWO 1.5 hour classes QUIETLY...no talking whatsoever!)
One of my friends posted a challenge to find three graces found in friends. What a kick ass challenge! I've been trying to find the good in others for a while now. When you find all of the good things that others have to offer, it is much easier to let the characteristics that drive you batty, go! Poof, they're gone, you only see the person and their good light!
The secretary that doesn't like to do the dishes LOVES to talk about her grandbabies. When she talks about them, her face lights up and she's a different person; a more lovable, kind soul that is full of grace. When I don't want to do the dishes, I make it a point to ask her about her grandchildren after I've washed the last glass...and I don't feel bitter that I washed the glasses when I see the good light.
I'm going to try this with all of the wonderful people in my life...join me?
One of the secretaries at my office will not do the dishes. REFUSES. She's been here for four months and I'm fairly confident that she hasn't done them once. She can hear when the other secretary does them. She can hear when I do them. Does she think she's too good to do them? Does she think she does more work than us? Who knows? I could easily let this eat at me. I could feed the negative thoughts when the other secretary vents to me.
Instead I've made a conscience decision to step away from the drama. When the other secretary vents, I let her get it all out and then tell her 'thank you for doing the dishes'. I usually continue to praise her and tell her that we really do appreciate that she helps out with the break room duties. She feels appreciated and we both end up laughing because I refer to her as Cinderella. I do the dishes on the days she isn't in the office. It's not hard, it doesn't take much effort and normally I enjoy the break from my office. Find the grace, step away from the drama.
When it's something I feel more passionately about, I have to use more focus to find the grace.
For example, take a loaded question: Can you believe the way he-she-they acted?
It is SOOOOO easy to respond to this question with drama: No, can you?! What is his-her-their deal? Why does he-she or do they need to act like that?
Practicing: Oh, whatever, maybe they had a bad day (exhale)! Do you have any fun plans for the weekend (inhale)?
Inhale the positive energy, exhale the drama! (Yes, I am really liking yoga AND I have successfully completed TWO 1.5 hour classes QUIETLY...no talking whatsoever!)
One of my friends posted a challenge to find three graces found in friends. What a kick ass challenge! I've been trying to find the good in others for a while now. When you find all of the good things that others have to offer, it is much easier to let the characteristics that drive you batty, go! Poof, they're gone, you only see the person and their good light!
The secretary that doesn't like to do the dishes LOVES to talk about her grandbabies. When she talks about them, her face lights up and she's a different person; a more lovable, kind soul that is full of grace. When I don't want to do the dishes, I make it a point to ask her about her grandchildren after I've washed the last glass...and I don't feel bitter that I washed the glasses when I see the good light.
I'm going to try this with all of the wonderful people in my life...join me?
I am in lowa! No more negative from now on!
ReplyDeleteYou made some good points... I will try this approach with someone who gets on my nerves.
ReplyDeleteSome days it's really hard, but in I always feel better when I choose to step away from the drama:)
DeleteKeri told me that Angie had a blog...since you commented, I was able to find it:) YAY!