Is it all an act?

This weekend was amazeballs. I skipped and hopped and twirled and laughed my way through a nine hour day of shopping. Admittedly, I was OVER it after 8 hours and started whining a little, but 9 hours is extreme, even for people that love to shop!

During conversation with a couple of my besties this weekend, I told them that I was going to learn to sew. (Not like actually create a piece of clothing (and certainly not make a freaking costume like Mel), but, you know, run-a-hem-in-pants type of sew;)). They said they would like to learn, too.

I said, "Well, great! When my friend comes over to teach me, you can come, too!"

I don't think she would like the "you" that you are around me. (and my other friend agreed)

Hmmmmph. (That's the sound of deflation)

I dismissed the statement quickly while hiding most of my sadness at that thought in, but hmmmmph, it's still there, in the back of my mind.

Well, crap! Do I act differently around different groups of friends? Why would she not like the "me" I am when I'm with another circle of friends? How do they think I act when I'm with other people?

So, now I'm trying to digest this thought. I like to think the answer is no, I don't act differently around different circles. BUT two of the people that know me better than most think that I do. Hmmmppph.

Both of the hoochies that I went shopping with are very good at knocking me down a few notches when I need it AND building me up when I need a step ladder. Either way, it's good to reflect and think about who you are and what you believe from time to time.

Is it an act? Am I being myself? Or the people pleaser that is often expected out of me? Who "gets" to see the real me? Who is the real me? 

In the end, the one looking back in the glass is who you end the day with; the one you have to be satisfied with when the day is done.  I'm still working on the person that I see when I look in the mirror. She still needs a lot of work, but I'm trying!