Crazy Daisies Troop 10576

Daisy Scouts Year End Party 2012

First Grade Girls LOVE to JUMP!!

And play in the water:)

Super impressed by the healthy eaters:)  All of them picked to eat carrots and at bedtime I cut up 8 large apples and set out an entire bowl of grapes...they devoured them!

Striking a pose before the scavenger hunt!!

They were totally into figuring out the clues...

By the end of the scavenger hunt they found all of the supplies to make a shirt!!

A stem of daisy from each daisy:)

Thank you for all of your hardwork Stacey!!

Wouldn't be a sleepover without a camp fire...and of course SMORES!!!!

So proud of all of the girls. 

 CRAZY DAISIES!!!

They were pinned and received multiple patches for all of their hard work!!

AWESOME SHIRTS:)  They all did their own designs:)

Surviving Spouse: Dating and Marriage

In my work I deal with surviving spouses on a daily to weekly basis.   The first meeting with an attorney serves as another step toward reality when you lose a loved one.   When this person is your life partner it's hard to hold it together for a meeting to discuss what happens next.

I have had clients openly admit that they might not remember our meeting the very next day because they took a bunch of anxiety pills prior to walking into our office.  I have listened to sobbing.  I have walked a woman to the restroom when she needed a break from all of the paper work and big words.  I have held an elderly mans hand as he told me the entire story of his life with his wife.  I have witnessed the look of relief on some and shock on others.

Each and every surviving spouse is different.  Actually, I could probably write a series of posts on surviving the death of a spouse from an outsiders view. Today I pick: dating after the loss of your spouse.

Today's post is spurred by an email from a mother to her children.  In the letter the mother defends her position in the dating world and confesses her love for another man.  A man that is not their father.  A man that her children will most likely grow to love, but they are still haunted by their own feelings of grief and loss.  Scared that their mother is jumping into things too quickly. They have expressed their views that this man is not anything like their father.  They just can't understand why it's necessary to get married so quickly, why rush?   The woman that lost her husband after fifty years of marriage is now defending her position to move on.

She doesn't want to disappoint her children, but she feels deserving of life with companionship and love.  Over and over  in her letter she defends the man that she plans to spend the remainder of her years with. I can't help but wonder why?

Why does she feel the need to defend her decision to move on?  She is a grown woman who was a devoted, loving mother and wife her entire life.  She didn't question her children when they made decisions that didn't mirror hers, but loved them unconditionally and picked up the pieces when their poor decision led to disaster.

Losing a parent is difficult no matter how old you are. Change is hard in general.  Yet, I don't think the grieving children should have the right to question their mother/father when they feel it's time to move on.

My friends have asked me if it's weird to think about my mother dating someone new.  I have met a couple the men she has decided are date worthy.  It's different, certainly.  However, I would like to think that if my mom found someone that she cared for enough to announce her engagement that I would support her rather than berate her with questions.  I want her to be happy. Whether that is happy alone or with someone else is her choice, not mine.

There isn't a book on how long a person should mourn the loss of their spouse because the feeling of loss never leaves.  There isn't a guide that states the specific amount of time that should be observed before dating after the loss of spouse because everyone is different.  

I understand that the children in this situation (all of adult age) are simply looking out for the surviving parent.  I get that. I have witnessed it. I have lived it.  I suppose what I want to share with my peers that are looking out for their surviving parent is to support them.  Love them unconditionally as they did for you.  IF, which is a big IF, because if they are choosing to get married again, I'm sure they have put serious thought into the decision, but IF something bad happens, help them to pick up the pieces again!  And again and again if that's what it takes. 

Please try not to make your parents feel bad for moving on.  Try to imagine yourself in their spot. Please for heavens sake, don't try to make them choose between you and the new person they have decided to spend their time with.  Love them, support them, get to know their new friend.

Who knows...you might actually like them!

How do you guard your thoughts?

The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts; therefore guard accordingly.  -Marcus Aurelius

I have a hard enough time filtering what slips out of my big mouth, let alone filtering my thoughts!!

But, I get the concept, I suppose.  Good thoughts produce good energy, bad thoughts seem to breed and multiply and invade your brain like a fast growing mold.

I am always uber emotional during that time of the month.  I notice my mind wandering more often, contemplating the hard issues in life, tears escape before I can suppress them, and the missing feelings are much worse when I can't seem to get a hold of my hormones. 

I started this post a couple days ago when I couldn't seem to concentrate on anything productive.  I would consciously think to myself "Ok, stop thinking about that!  It doesn't do any good, I can't do anything to change it, and it doesn't matter."  But it's like my mind is handcuffed; holding my positive thoughts out and recycling the bad thoughts on replay.  I am stuck wondering, questioning, spinning and spinning, but fully knowing that the answers can't be found in a book and I can't google them.

What do you do when you can't stop thinking about something?  Where is the key to the handcuffs? How do you let go of the pain?

I suppose you guard your thoughts...easier said than done.

**Sorry for the few males that follow!  I know the mention of "that time of the month" makes some men squeamish:)

One of "those" moms!

PRE-children...I can only faintly remember pre-children, but I do remember thinking that I wasn't going to be one of "those" moms.  I was going to do it the right way, but not go overboard.  I was going to give them what they needed, but not everything that they wanted.  I learned from my parents what I wanted to emulate and the things that I wanted to change. Pretty much, I planned to be the perfect mom, not one of "those" moms!

I wasn't going to be one of "those" moms that asked her daughters if they have a boyfriend...or every single one of her friends when they come over (JEAN).  Right now I don't have to ask because Lilly can not lie AT ALL, so at the slightest mention of the boy she has a crush on, her face turns beat red:) However, once I can't tell by her reaction, I'm sure that I will be THAT Mom that asks my daughters who they like!

I certainly wasn't going to be one of "those" moms that let my 4 and 7 year old girls shop at the trendy stores just because all of their friends were.  I grew up on Value City and I am perfectly fine...well, I guess that is a questionable statement...I will rephrase.  I grew up on Value City and it did not harm my health, I still had friends and I didn't feel like I was poor simply because I didn't wear Abercrombie.  Contrary to Aaron's thoughts on the subject, I think I do a good job pacifying the girls without succumbing to the JUSTICE propaganda very often.  I always print coupons if we decide to make a trip to the trendy little store and limit them to one outfit each. In actuality I can count on one hand the number of times I have entered the store. Sometimes I just can't resist though!  Not because I think the clothes are cuter or better made, but because the girls light up when I tell them that they can get to pick out an outfit from Justice.  So, I guess I'm one of "those" moms that shops at Justice.

I definitely wasn't going to be one of "those" moms that was strict about bed time.  I thought kids should be flexible and I didn't want bed time to run my life. UNTIL I witnessed one too many tantrums after a skipped nap or consecutive late nights. Now, my kids are in bed by 8:30 on school nights if at all possible.  They are allowed to stay up later on the weekends, but I am still mindful of their sleep pattern.  If they are up late one night, I try not to let them stay up late the next or make them take a nap if I anticipate two late nights.  So, I guess I'm one of "those" moms that is strict about sleep schedules.

I wasn't going to be one of "those" moms that let their children walk out the door without brushing their teeth in the morning.  Have to admit, I'm positive this has happened more than once.  In the rush to pack lunches, brush hair, get the perfect toy to prevent melt down, get out the door, sometimes I forget to check teeth.  I'm one of "those" moms that let's their children leave without brushing their teeth.

Now, I don't think I will mind it if I'm refereed to as one of those moms. 

I'm still learning.  I make parenting mistakes almost every day.  I yell when I should try explaining why something is wrong...again for the 100 millionth time.  I expect too much. I'm far from the perfect mom that I planned to be.  I turn into mean mommy at 8:31 when I hear talking, laughing, footsteps and sinks running.

BUT, I don't mind if people call me one of "those" moms.  I'm confident that I am doing the best that I can.  I show and tell my children as often as possible that I love them.   If that makes me one of those moms, I'm proud to be one of those moms!  Don't be offended when you're called one of "those" moms, take pride in it:)

To the people categorizing their friends, family and complete strangers into "those" moms: Maybe, just maybe, you should take a look in the mirror.   The things that make you one of those moms may be different than the ones that make me one of those moms, but you do have your own quirky behaviors.  Maybe before you judge others, you should think of all of the things you were never going to do until you actually had a child of your own.  Sometimes I think people categorize out of jealousy, sometimes out of lack of knowledge.  We all do it even if we aren't meaning to. 

Cheryl and Nichole are "those" moms that pack the 100% healthy, perfect lunches, EVERY DAY!  I categorize them out of jealousy...I WISH I took the time to pack lunches for my monsters like that every day, but I don't.  Just because I'm lazy doesn't mean I should tease them...Luckily they both know me and will not find me drawing attention to them being overachievers at all offensive:)  Actually, they expect it out of me!  But I should try not to categorize them, I suppose:)


It'd be better if we all simply tried to judge less and love more, but in the meantime, I'll be happy being one of THOSE moms! 

Donuts for breakfast...Yep, I'm one of "THOSE" moms!



Tutu serious

I'm being tutu serious when I say that it is a scary image when I try on the tutu!  I tried it on again last night to see if there was any improvement...NOPE...still scary!

I guess I should get serious since it's less than a month away! EEKKK!!!

I forget what day I'm on...yesterday I did have a salad for lunch and half of a burger, a few bites of potato, key lime pie yogurt and did turbo kick

5/9 Protein bar, tuna sandwich on wheat, doritos, One piece of cheese pizza, two pieces of cheesy bread with ranch, raspberry chocolate yummyness from the coffee shop...with whip cream, one piece of chocolate sheet cake, glass of milk...I AM AWFUL AND DIETING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  No workout

5/10 Protein bar, coffee, chai latte with soy, 3 piece chicken select, medium fry, lemonade, one piece of cheese pizza, an entire bag of lays wavy, piece of texas sheet cake, 4 beers; no workout...planned to do one, but had to much cleaning to do:/  Going to force myself to do one both Saturday and Sunday to get in 4 this week!

5/11 handful of m&m, pretzel, almond mix, I'm getting a salad ONLY because I plan to pig out AGAIN tonight at my family cookout that seems to keep growing in size with each passing minute:)

Maybe I'll get TUTU SERIOUS next week? Eh, probably not!

I hope everyone has a wonderful mother's day weekend...I think I'm done writing down what I eat because it doesn't help and I don't feel bad when I eat poorly anyways!  I'll post a picture of us at the warrior dash next month for your entertainment purposes and to complete the Tutu series;)

Vacation for ballerinas

This weekend I totally went off the eating healthy plan.  I didn't force my kids to take a nap on Saturday. I let them have lots of candy. I didn't stay up all hours of the night.  I didn't even ask for a babysitter so that I could go out with Aaron on his weekend off.  Instead we did activities together as a family, sat on the couch together, cleaned the house together, went to lunch together...no wonder people like to have relaxing weekends!!

To most people my weekend probably wouldn't even qualify as a relaxing weekend, but it's the best I can do.  I ate a TON of food! Too much to type...I went to a party with a taco/burrito bar and made multiple trips.  I went to Monami brunch buffet and made multiple trips.  I had twix candy bars.  O-bars. chips. beer.  Seriously, too much to type!  I did run 1.5 miles, walked for CF, ran around at softball practice, but only worked out 3 times this week...bad bad bad!

I guess I'll start tracking again since the vacation for ballerinas is over:(  I probably put back on the inch that I shed...it was worth it.  The food and drink was yummy:)  Katie convinced me that even if we have a bad day/days/weekend we should continue to jump back on the eating healthy train, again and again, as often as necessary...

Day #21: Protein bar, coffee, turkey grinder with chips, chicken fajitas (2), CHIPS...I was hungry!  I did refrain from Biggby's earlier in the day because Katie texted me that she was trying to eat healthier too...I couldn't stay away from the chips.  FAIL!!!!! I only had a handful, but I still wasn't satisfied so I had a small bowl of blueberry frosted miniwheats. FAIL!!!!...I'm just not meant to be super skinny I have decided!; Walk with Heidi:) Run a mile

Day #22: Protein bar, coffee...I'm going to post this NOW so that I force myself to order a salad rather than go to the bagel shop like I really want to!!! 

Here is a picture of me in my tutu:)

Witness

Tell me how your life has been changed by Christ.  It can be a specific example of how you witnessed Christ the other day at the grocery store, how you see God at work through others, or your life journey, your conversion experience or any other way Christ has changed your life.

This is the challenge presented by Pastor Jennifer Williamson a few weeks ago.  It's common knowledge that I love her and continually she insists on trying to make me a better person.  When she first presented the challenge I thought to myself, I've already done this exercise for her!  I obviously should be awarded a get out of homework free pass since I not only wrote a very personal witness, but also delivered a message to the congregation on my witness! I thought to myself nobody really wants to hear me witness again.  I just told a huge chunk of my story in October!   You can read it here:  http://publiclookin.blogspot.com/2011/10/as-some-of-you-know-one-of-things-that.html

Two days after listening to the sermon on witnessing, I received the most beautiful witness account from one of my friends in my inbox.  Tears were streaming down my face as she recited her most recent encounter with Christ. I felt so very honored that she felt compelled to share her witness with me.  I wished I could hug her at that very second.  The love of Christ was overflowing, seeping out of every pore, compassion and grace were taking over a spot in her heart that used to hold sadness and loss. It made me feel more connected to her and Him...

Then I discarded the witness thing again.  This time I used the excuse that I witness all the time.  I am open and honest with everyone that asks about my faith and my faith journey.  I invite people to join me in church and at Bible study whenever I feel it appropriate.  I often ask for prayers.  That's enough, right?

Last night I had a young woman over who is trying to start a women's ministry in the university atmosphere.  She was raw and honest.  Her enthusiasm to reach out is obvious.  She openly told her story of coming to live for God.  Once I again I felt inspired and more connected to this young lady and Him. 

So, I decided I will witness again...now that I feel called to do so.  I've decided not to witness on my personal journey this time, but instead I will witness about how God uses me to work for Him.  More particularly when I feel "called" to do something and what I get to witness when I act on what I feel called to do.

Many times it's as simple as picking up the phone.  I have made it a practice to call someone or shoot them a text when they pop into my head.  I can't even count the number of times their first response is something to the tune of "I am so happy to hear your voice, I am having a particularly bad day today".  When we talk through the problems we are facing, usually both parties leave the conversation a little more confident in their ability to tackle whatever it is they are overwhelmed with at the time.  I used to think, I'll call them tomorrow or I'm going to see them next week.  Now I call them as soon as I can, just in case they popped into my head because they need me then, not tomorrow or next week. Listen when you are called.

Sometimes, well I haven't in a long time, but I will be sending one this week, I send cards.  Handmade, personalized to the recipient, out of the blue, just because cards.  Have you ever received a card like this?  Didn't it make you feel special, cared for, loved?  I already know who I want to send the card to, I have the address in my inbox and I have a deadline of Wednesday to send it.  I can't wait until the person receives it.  I hope they understand how much they are loved and admired for their strength, honesty and grace by people they probably think have long since forgotten about them.  Act on the random thoughts that run around in your head!

Occasionally, I drive by a place and feel like I just have to stop.  Sometimes it's our former neighbor, Betty.  Sometimes it's a friend in the hospital. Sometimes it's my aunt and uncles house.  No matter where it is, I ALWAYS feel better when I stop.  Even if we are super busy, need baths and snacks and I know we will not be ready in time for bedtime.  Even if I'm tired and cranky.  Even if I'm supposed to be working.

Last week I was running errands for one of the partners at the firm.  I drove by the hospital the first time and thought "Hmm, I should probably stop. She did have particularly awful night."  Even though I was working, I just had to stop, just for a little visit so that my friend would know that I was thinking about her.  I stopped in the gift shop and purchased a willow tree figurine (my absolute favorite thing to give during times of need as most of my friends can attest to).   I found the perfect one!  A perfect little boy holding up a balloon with "hope" spelled inside the balloon...and a Snickers because that's her fav;) What I witnessed was a frightened mother clinging to her faith.  Rather than asking "why me?" or question the doctors as to why she must stay in the hospital, she has decided to give it all to God.   I was able to make her laugh and hug away just an ounce of fear because I stopped my busy life for a second to tell her that I'm praying, that I'm here and I love her.  Don't drive by because you're too busy.

What do I get to witness when I listen to the calling? Love, mercy, grace; All of the things that draw me closer to Him.   All of the reasons I am so hungry to learn more about His words.  Listen when you are called, act and take the time to extend His Grace.  You'll be surprised what you are able to witness!