Proverbs 3:5-6
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.
I hate how everything seems to be going well; everything is calm, everyone is coasting along, trying to live each day to the fullest...until you aren't. Until you can't. Until you are stuck in the hospital recovering from surgery and dealing with a difficult diagnosis. Until you are told your baby will need potent chemo and yucky steroids and truckloads of antibiotics. Until you lose your sister. Until the doctor can't find what they need to find and can't answer your questions. Until you are waiting for test results. Until you are counting down the days until your treatment is done rather than the days until Christmas. Until you so want to be excited and hopeful about new life or the possibility of new life, but you're still hesitant and filled with doubt. Until you try to focus on the happy thoughts of raising money for a wonderful cause and hope for a cure, but really just wish you didn't have to fight for the cure or think about the horrid disease at all. Until you can't breathe.
I've been saving this story in my heart for when I thought someone really needed it, for a really big "until then" moment. Because when I heard the story, it warmed my heart. As a friend told her story, standing so beautifully as we watched our kids play in the sun, she made me believe in hope and true love and fighting for the people and causes you care about. This week, I really need it. Some of the people that I love dearly really need it, so I'll share. Mostly because I want to hear "I can't believe it" in a "WOW, that is awesome, I can't believe that story is true!" rather than "I can't believe it, he is so healthy" or "he is so young, how can this be true?"
Psalm 56:3 When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.
Over a decade ago, a cute, young girl agreed to a date with an older boy. The sweet girl knew the older boy from high school, but more as an acquaintance than anything else. The older boy had already graduated from high school, but I'm positive he was still considered a "Big Man on Campus" as he excelled in athletics and he's still good looking in his thirties, so I have no doubt he was a stud in his day;)
As the sweet girl prepared for her date, I'm sure she was filled with excitement. At the age of eighteen you have the whole world in front of you! I witnessed the enthusiasm and wonder in my cousins eyes as we celebrated her birthday this week. I can only imagine that Cheryl had the same sparkle in her eye at that age. I have no doubt that she was overflowing with this same enthusiasm and wonder as she prepared for her date at a Haunted House. Haunted Houses are fun, even if the date did turn out to be lame!
If you can remember far enough back to your days in high school, you can probably remember that the days can be long with school and extra curricular activities. The day of her first date wasn't any different for Cheryl. She went to school, went to swim practice and by the time she started the date, she was tired! As the frightening Haunted House drew closer to the end, the exhaustion overwhelmed her small body. Her young, strong date ended up carrying her to the car.
She didn't feel any better throughout the weekend. The excitement of her date was overshadowed by her extremely pale, almost translucent skin. The butterflies weren't just from wonder about her first date, but also because she didn't have an answer as to why she was exhausted. The testing started. A confirmed diagnosis: Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL).
Devastation, despair, worry, anxiety, depression, complication, crisis, uncertainty, nail biting. Why? How? NOT FAIR!
Who strutted into the hospital, face covered with concern and care? This young boy that had only taken her on one date! Personally, I don't know of many 20 year old BOYS that would be standing in line to visit the hospital after one date at a Haunted House. I don't know many young men that would stick around to witness the brutal treatment plan a person that wants to beat leukemia must endure after one date. Jeff was already a man at 20. He was there for Cheryl for all of the bad tricks (and pricks and vomiting and mood swings and swollen face...you know, the complete hell that you are forced to live through in order to beat cancer), but now, over a decade later, he gets to enjoy all of the TREATS!!
Although they haven't been back to a haunted house in twelve years (as it is considered to be "bad juju"), they do live their lives to the fullest. They are doting parents to two beautiful girls. They enjoy spending time with their family. They kick our behinds in sand volleyball. They support the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society along with many other charities. The long term effects of the rigorous treatment plan Cheryl endured while she was only in her teens are few and completely manageable.
Psalm 5:11-12
11 But let all who take refuge in you be glad;
let them ever sing for joy.
Spread your protection over them,
that those who love your name may rejoice in you.
12 Surely, LORD, you bless the righteous;
you surround them with your favor as with a shield.
As I say my prayers tonight, as I struggle each day to find the positive and to enjoy each sunrise, it still helps to hear stories of triumph and hope and love. Praying fervently for many of my friends tonight. Praying that they can remember stories like this one of love and hope and cures. Praying that others can feel my support as they say goodbyes, go to appointments, receive test results and endure treatments. Hoping that they feel can feel God's hand in theirs and allow that feeling to take some of the worry away and replace the worry with hope and faith.
Trust and Believe through the worry.