Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Illusion of Bliss

I'm not sure that I'm ready to write tonight.  I have been wound up lately and I don't know if I can concentrate on one subject for more than a millisecond, but I'll try.  It will probably be easiest if I break it down since I don't really even understand what I want to say...

Google definition of Bliss: Perfect Happiness; great joy. 

Perfect happiness.  What is the hell is that? How do you get it?  Is it even possible?  If somehow you succeed and find it, how long can you keep it?

Google definition of illusion: A deceptive appearance or impression.

Looks can be deceiving.  I  am so often fooled by this!  I don't know if it's because I don't want to see under the surface smile or people are so good at putting on their "happy face" or what.  I think it's because I like to wear my rose colored glasses.  During conversation recently, I found out that a friend isn't as "blissfully happy" as I assumed.  They are always happy and smiling when I see them. They always seem put together and ready to tackle any obstacle, but really they are crumbling underneath.  I understand this feeling and knowing that they are struggling is hard to swallow.   When my friend blurted their feelings out so bluntly, it took my breath away.  I was at a loss for words.  I knew that nothing that I could say would make them feel any better, any differently.

When I'm struggling with similar feelings, I push them away.  Out of sight, out of mind.  I'm sure that's not how you're supposed to deal with your feelings, but it's how I do.  Sometimes when I feel stronger I pull down the box from the shelf, open it and let go of some of the hurt, anger, and sadness.  Most of the time I just leave it on the shelf.

It's easier stay awash in the illusion of bliss. 

Can you live forever awash in the illusion of this bliss? 

I hope Sarah sings 'Illusions of Bliss'!! So excited and wrapped up in the illusion of bliss;) 

Praying for so many lately...too many to list or count. 

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