Sand

We loaded the car, the kids overflowing with anticipation! They didn't know exactly what to expect, but could tell that all of the adults were excited so they knew this trip was going to be great! We boarded the plane: skipping, twirling, dinosaur stomping. The kids were angelic the entire flight; couldn't have asked for more! This was going to be a wonderful family vacation! Our first without my dad, but really he was there in all of our hearts as he is each and every day. We landed safely, we found our rental, the sense of adventure still obvious in the eyes of the children and adults alike.

Shortly after we arrived to the beach I received a text from one of my friends that we had left the lights on in our car. I told him not to text me any more bad news because I was on vacation! I planned to leave my phone off most of the week. I didn't want my bosses to be able to reach me. I didn't want the temptation of texting my friends. I just wanted to sit on the beach and relax.

We arrived at the condo and were on the beach as soon as we could get our suits on, sun screened and throw down our luggage. The weather was perfect, truly unmatched in our vacation history. It didn't even rain once! Everything was going according to plan...and we all know how I like things to go as planned! Maybe I should have told the rest of my family to turn off their phones, too! But even if I would have, I would have read the news as soon as I logged on today and then the Zajak family would have been missing the prayers from our family the entire week and that wouldn't be acceptable either. Life continues when you're on vacation, whether you like it or not.

We heard the story shortly into our trip and received updates quite frequently during the remainder of our stay. To receive updates, send prayers and love, or donate, click here Each time someone would call a few more tears would sneak out of my mom's eyes, Jake and Aaron would fall silent and turn away and I would occupy myself with one of the children to keep away the all too familiar sting of the tears welling up in my eyes from overflowing. Laine updated us on the medical terminology and told us success stories since she is the charge nurse for this type of brain injury at the Clinic. Aaron reminded us that his dad recovered from a similar brain injury when we were only babies. Dana called and reminded Jake that his dad fully recovered from severe brain trauma. The calls and texts were obvious reminders, but I was stuck on sand.

Sand. As a dear friend has reminded me, each of us are but tiny grains of sand fleeing about wildly, flying from this adventure to the next, careless and alone until the tide comes in and brings us back together, gets us wet and we are once again reunited. "We are but grains of sand on the beach. Sometimes water hits us and keeps us together. Sometimes sunshine hits us and keeps us apart. Each will continue to take their cycle on us..."

This week I couldn't help but to compare our small towns to this analogy. Everyone goes to work each day, completes their housework, their yard work goes to their children's sporting events, attends church, etc. etc. etc. Often days go by without thinking of someone, weeks pass without running into them, months and even years sneak by before a wedding or funeral bring everyone together again.

Sometimes we might feel like getting out a hair dryer to dry off and separate from certain grains of sand, sometimes we can't stand that everyone is so connected to one another in small towns. Often the "did you hear this?" or "did you see that?" is enough to make you want to load the plane and not come back!

Still, when something tragic happens, it is all of the grains of sand that help to hold everything, everyone together. The tiny grains of sand that are always close by you whenever it sprinkles, the ones that aren't far during the spring showers, the ones that faithfully appear when the rain just doesn't seem to let up...even the ones that sometimes you would like the drought of summer to dry out and blow away, when you feel like you're drowning, you'll need them all to be pulling for you. You'll need every last grain of sand, damp, together, compacted, specifically placed neatly in their part of the sand castle. Ready to fight for each and every one of the fellow grains of sand until they are once again ready to stand on their own. Gary has touched so many people in Woodvile and Elmore. Some are still here, some are scattered all over the world, but right now he needs us all to be pulling for him. Maybe the rain is our reminder to keep the castle strong, every grain at attention, standing guard for him and his family.

I have felt the community come together, each grain of sand, strategically placed to form the perfect sand castle. The castle both surrounding and supporting the grains of sand that are weak. I remember at the calling hours for my dad, a day that I don't remember much of, how Gary gently approached me as we said goodbye to my dad at the funeral home. I remember how he hugged me oh so tight. He told me that he read my blog titled "Daddy's Girl" with one of his own Daddy's Girls. How he cried with his baby girl and hugged her tight that day, just as he was hugging me then. He thanked me for my words and told me that my dad would be so proud of the way I handled myself, not just on the day of the showing or funeral, but each day; the everyday struggles otherwise known as life.

To the two Daddy's Girls and Steve: your dad is proud of you, always. His face lights up when he talks about you. From reading your caringbridge site I can tell that he passed on the secret to you, the secret to life. His optimism and genuine personality is admired by all. Stay strong knowing that we are all behind you, beside you and in front of you. Lifting you up in prayer and good thoughts. Hoping and praying that tomorrow brings that "little bit better" moment. Also wanting you to know that if that "little bit better" moment doesn't come that we'll all still be here. Still be here sending all of our love and support to get you through each difficult day, each delicate decision, every scream for him to wake up...we will still be here praying for you all.

Tonight I can't seem to type fast enough about how important the continued support is. The cards don't go unnoticed, the messages aren't overlooked, the love is appreciated and real. Gary, Beth and his family deserve all the prayers they can get. They need every last grain of sand standing their post. The best weapon is prayer, use it. I'm sure I will be shaking sand out of things for a while, I'll say a prayer each time I see a tiny grain.

My new favorite song!